This one is for everyone, BUT this one is a shout out to the women who think it's okay to be a martyr every single day. To the women who put everyone else's needs before their own and to the ones who are burned out and stressed out and angry.
Yeah, I've been there way too much to count—totally full of resentment, not paying attention to my own crap to workout and definitely not paying attention to my own needs. My self-care regimen was sweeping everything under the rug (much different than letting go) and pushing myself too hard or getting into relationships where I was distracted by the drama of them. It was a familiar pattern—I was waiting for someone to notice, to change, so I could finally be taken care of. Total wrong approach. We believe in the fairy tale rescue much to the detriment of our entire existence. A half assed life full of disconnected expectations.
Yep, totally there for too long. The stress of it, of the disconnection, of the holding back, of the not speaking up, of playing small, of putting my well being as something outside of me. This pattern created tons of flare ups. Lots of momentum in chronic illness, and it takes lots of focus to let it go and to allow a new belief to emerge.
And, a new belief is absolutely possible.
It takes courage and a willingness to drop the attachment to being sick. Being sick isn't YOU. Being sick is a part of you, but it is not the definition of you. It can be super scary to acknowledge that the illness you have is fueled by stress, long time chronic stress, because it feels like a form of blame. It isn't at all. The blame and guilt you feel about anyone or anything whether directed at someone else or yourself just causes more stress and perpetuates the cycle of more illness. We feel guilty for way too much in our culture, and it keeps us in the role of martyr. We can do good things by being ourselves, which means more love for who you are no matter what. Love for yourself always spills over to love for others.
Have you ever been so in the zone and so happy that you feel no pain? Maybe it has happened when you were dancing or walking or laughing. You are energized and renewed and super focused. That is alignment, and that is YOU. Illness is a move away from YOU. Everyone feels fear and stress, but you get to choose what to do with it. It does not have to consume you. You do not have to suffer to be happy. Suffering can be done right now if you want it to be.
You aren't a victim.
You are full of life and meant to thrive.
Face your fears with love and curiosity and then let them go.
Make room for more alignment. More allowing. Less resistance.
Lots of love and light always,