I cried. This week that has been occurring more than often. I have felt the crossroads and the clearing rapidly approaching. Big change inevitable in the wake of life's big ole contrast of beauty and less than beauty designed to get your attention—designed to transform and push you more than thought possible. The problems that we all face all close up and personal, no way to deny it or brush it away. This time had to be different. Because, what was all this breaking out and doing it on my own for? I could just go back to living a life I'd never really wanted. I could just tell the naysayers that they were all right. But f*** that. I didn't just keep my resolve and feeling of certainty even when it looked otherwise for nothing. I kept my faith, and I have talked nothing but that to anyone, because I knew that this was an inside job, and if I talked about anything other than that, I would have pulled myself in a direction I was no longer willing to go. I had to know for myself of what I was really made. I've known, according to other people's opinions, and they've most been so encouraging and so beautiful, so it was damn time for me to find that same feeling for me, and today I cried. It has been a year plus that I've been consciously coming to this point, but the past week or so I've been propelled into hyper drive. It was now or a forever limbo of sort of kind of knowing the fullness of me, but today I cried, because I finally feel free—free times infinity. It is cathartic, liberating, joyous, the best feeling of relief ever. I no longer feel compelled to do anything that goes against my own intuition. I just know. I finally get what true freedom is—a complete acceptance of the true you. It is a remembering of who I am and why I'm here. It is my choice how it goes from here. I know I don't control when or how, but I certainly get to control the navigation from a place of intuition and ultimate authenticity. I cried out of certainty, out of unwavering faith. It is my sincerest hope that you all be there and know the power of you. YOU have a say in how it goes. You choose freedom. It comes from within. All that other good stuff on the outside is just there for you to enjoy.
When you're free, you get to choose how you feel no matter the circumstance.
Be free and wonderfully you.